I Don't Wait Anymore.

When I was 16, I got a purity ring.

And when I was 25, I took it off.

I didn’t tell anyone I was doing it — it wasn’t a statement or an emotional thing. I just slipped it off my finger that day and, before tucking it away in a box, ran my finger around the words on the familiar gold band.

“True Love Waits.” Waits.

What’s it “waiting” for, anyway?

*****

I had my reasons for deciding not to wear it anymore. Other people might have other reasons. It’s a graveyard of hearts, this place where single church girls crash into their late 20s and early 30s. Churches see the symptoms. They scramble to reach out to the ever-growing young adult singles crowd who feels alienated by family-oriented services.

But there’s something bigger behind it than that.

Much bigger.

There are a lot of girls out there who don’t know who God is anymore – the God of their youth group years just isn’t working out. Back then, that God said to wait for sex until they are married, until He brings the right man along for a husband. They signed a card and put it on the altar and pledged to wait.

And wait they did.

*****

And waited and waited and waited.

Some of them have prayed their whole lives for a husband, and he hasn’t shown up. They’ve heard the advice to “be the woman God made you to be, focus on that, and then the husband will come.” They’ve read “Lady in Waiting,” gotten super involved in church and honed their domestic skills.

And still they wait.

More than a decade ago, a youth leader handed them a photocopied poem in Sunday School written to them from “God” that said, “The reason you don’t have anyone yet is because you’re not fully satisfied in Me. You have to be satisfied with Me and then when you least expect it, I’ll bring you the person I meant for you.”

And the girls see it posted on their bulletin boards from time to time.

“You’re right, God,” they say. “We’re not satisfied in you yet. We will put you first and then you can bring us a husband in your timing.”

But many of them – if they’re honest – will tell you that time has passed, and it’s wrecking their view of God.

If this is who God’s supposed to be, then He’s tragically late.

So some decide to chuck “Lady in Waiting” out the window … and possibly their virginity with it. Church goes next. God might go next, too. If He doesn’t answer these prayers after they’ve held up their end of the bargain, why would He answer any others?

Whether it was the fault of the leaders, the fault of us girls, or both, a tragedy happened back then.

A lot of girls were sold on a deal and not on a Savior.

*****

I had that poem on my bulletin board all through high school – the one where “God” was telling me to fall in love with Him first and then I would be able to fall in love with a husband later.

Who wrote that poem anyway?

Pretty sure it wasn’t God.

When Jesus was here on the earth, the crowds would follow Him because they saw He gave good things. But that’s not what He wanted. He wanted their hearts for Himself. So He would turn to them and say things like, “If you don’t love Me so much that every other relationship in your life looks like hate by comparison, you can’t follow Me.” (Matthew 10:34-39, paraphrase)

That sounds a lot different from the poem.

Christ is the source of everything we need and the giver of all good gifts … but in telling people about Him, it’s possible we’ve sold them on a solution for life’s problems and not life itself.

What if we as girls had learned early on that having Him was everything, not a means to the life we think He would want us to have.

If we had learned we don’t abstain from sex because we’re “waiting.” We abstain because we love Him.

If I’d had on my bulletin board, “Fall in love with Jesus.” That’s it. Bottom line. That’s everything you need to know, to work toward, to put your hope in.

If I’d learned who He is, what He wants, how to give Him everything, not “wait” so that one day I could give my everything to someone else.

If I’d learned that it’s not bad to pray for a husband, but that my greater prayer should be for Him to spend my life as He chooses for His glory.

If we as believers make that our message, things could be drastically different for a lot of girls wondering why the God they think they learned to follow doesn’t compute. It doesn’t necessarily stop the desire for a husband or end all feelings of loneliness, but it does show a God who provides, loves and gives infinite purpose even to our singleness rather than a God who categorically denies some who pray for husbands while seemingly giving freely to others.

It shows that while marriage is good, He is the greater goal.

*****

Don’t think I’ve done this perfectly.

I’d be deceiving you if you thought that. I’ve had relationships where I made major mistakes. I’ve gone through angst-ridden phases where I met with friends to plead together with God to bring us husbands. I’ve planned major life decisions around possibilities.

I lived like I was waiting for something.

And that’s why I slipped off my ring that day. It wasn’t that I wanted to sleep with people – I haven’t. It wasn’t a slap to True Love Waits, or to anyone who wears a purity ring – saving sex for marriage is good and is His design.

I just didn’t want to wait anymore – didn’t want to live like I was waiting on anyone to get here.

I already have Him … and He is everything.

“Follow Christ for His own sake, if you follow Him at all.” – J.C. Ryle

(I Don’t Wait Anymore (the book), now available.)

1,769 Responses

  1. Wow!!! I’m surprised I didn’t fry my computer with the tears. This is exactly where I am at. I have been told similar things and have waited for a long time. My view of God was changed and not in a positive way. To be honest I am sick of waiting. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the redirection. I will be sharing this with my younger sister:) What a blessing and encouragement this has been.

  2. I think as a few others have stated, that the intentions of the ring have been miscommunicated by the giver or misinterpreted by the wearer. We often hear what we want to hear or take the meanings of things in a black/white concrete image, rather than what falls into the abstract grey areas. As with many other biblical teachings, the symbols we wear or the things that we do should only be a reminder to us of the commitments we have made…..an outward symbol of an inward change. Perspective is the key !

  3. I really appreciated your view on this subject. Thank you for posting. It’s funny; I actually wear my purity ring for the reason you don’t. It’s more than just waiting for a husband who may never come. After going through numerous crushes, I’ve finally realized that, while He may have one for me for His glory, I may also be single for my whole life for His glory. I’m not waiting, I’m enjoying my time with Jesus because He is my husband. He is everything. My ring also does not say ‘True Love Waits’ but ‘FAITH’. He wants us to pray for His will so he can change our hearts to follow it.

  4. I know it was not your intention, but this post almost perfectly embodies why I’m so afraid to take my future children to church. As someone who was raised Quaker, and has always struggled with the practice of organized religion and youth groups, I think you hit the nail on the head when you pointed out that God didn’t write that poem. And it’s so sad to think of something as simple as waiting for love until God decides it’s time is enough for so many people to turn away from their faith. Because God didn’t say that, either.

    This was beautifully written. Thank you.

    1. But at the same time, God does call us to be involved with and surrounded by the body of Christ. Over and over again in Acts we see that Christians meet together in groups, worship together, live together and eat together. Being a Christian is as much outward and communal as it is inward.

      I understand, however, your hesitancy as many modern American churches have lost sight of the church being a PEOPLE not a place. The best advice, however, is to be very particular at what church you join. Make sure the leadership is Gospel-centered, not ignoring the Holy Spirit and preaching the truth. When you have excellent leaders, often that tumbles out upon the people.

  5. When I first read this blog, I was angry. But as I reached the end, I realized what your point actually was, and I realized that somewhere between the parents (or youth leaders) and the children, the wrong thing was communicated. True Love Waits is about saving sex for marriage. It ISN’T about “waiting” to live. It isn’t about waiting for a husband. But in our culture, it’s really hard to believe that sex isn’t more important than commitment, promises, relationship. So as a parent, I apologize to you for failing to communicate the right thing, for going for the easy lesson instead of the correct one, for letting you hear it in legal terms instead of moral ones.

  6. I think another reason why many might have remained single longer is because the ring looks to others like you are already married. I always thought staying pure was great but the ring… not so much. And I agree with your thoughts on waiting. Yes to waiting for marriage for sex but not to waiting to live.

  7. I took my promise ring off by accident. I was in nursing school and we weren’t allowed to wear jewelry to clinicals. So instead of always taking it off and putting it on I left it off realizing the ring wasn’t what made the conviction in my heart. It was just something I decided. Not even with church or youth group. But when I was 24 and saw that no one was coming for me I started realizing that maybe that true love waits was a lie. Maybe I didn’t need to wait. Maybe I needed to love my life. Because waiting meant staying at home not doing anything that might mean I’d be looked down on. So I started living so that the world could see me. Still being a good girl but taking chances as well. And I didn’t wait until marriage. I fell madly deeply passionately in love with the man that is now my husband and we agreed that we were ready for that commitment. We have been married over a year now and I would not change the way our relationship happened. I waited for true love. And I have him my purity ring on our wedding day like I always wanted.

  8. This is my life right now. My boyfriend and I broke up about 3 weeks ago. We had been dating for nearly 4 years (although 3 years of that were long distance). When I saw him at the end of the summer he told me he planned on beginning to save for an engagement ring, that he felt like we were meant together, but several weeks later he told me that the Lord had put it on his heart that we needed to sacrifice our relationship as he was coveting it above God (completely unintentionally). He’s a new Christian, and we started dating only a week after his baptism. He has never really had much time as a single Christian to grow in Christ so I know this time is good for him, well for us both actually, but it is painful. I have worn a purity ring for 6 years now, but I never really had that fear of waiting (the ring was more of a reminder of my values). Right out of high school I knew what I wanted to do with my life, where I was going to college, and how I was going to serve the Lord, and when I least expected it he put a wonderful man into my life, who I have felt the past 3 years was who the God wanted me to be with.

    But now I have that fear and I’m battling that instinct to wait. Now the life I thought was starting to blossom has completely changed direction, part of me want to just sit right here and go, “Ok, Lord, I’m just going to sit right here while you fix this situation.” I still feel, hope, and pray that I was not mistaken that he is in fact the man God has chosen for me (I never thought I could regard someone as highly or love them so fully on earth, or know a person who brought out Christ’s light in me, or someone who truly loves the Lord our God with his whole heart, even if that means giving up us) and I love him more today because of his actions and his willingness to serve God %100. And that is where I have been stuck. How long do I keep praying for him to reunite us? I want to open my heart to God’s desires, but I’m having trouble (in this fog of emotions) distinguishing between His and my own. Should I just try and drop all of my feelings toward my now bff (we can’t seem to call ourselves exs, because the term is so harsh and we still talk almost everyday) and attempt to go back to that pre-dating state where I was content (not exactly happy) and trusting being single? Does God want me to forget the Love we shared to do that, and if my feelings don’t change do I try and force myself? I love the Lord and I agreed with the breakup because I want His will to be done, and I want to see my bff and I strengthened in Jesus’ love.

    And that’s something I realized I need to work on, is not loving people any less but God just more and more (that Matthew 10:34-39 has popped up more times in the past few weeks, I think it is God trying to send me a message as well)! I want Him to expand my heart until it overflows! And after I read this article it made me really think good and hard about where my life is right now, and cry for quite a few minutes in reflection. That more and more this year I have noticed the time passing and how often I put things off and then regret it later because I lost the opportunity. I don’t want to be that with God’s will. But every since the future, which I thought was the one God had wanted for me, crashed I feel stuck in the pit of waiting.

    I know I need to get up and keep pushing forward for Him and for the ultimate goal (Philippians 3:12-21), that like you said, life is not about finding a husband but preparing for heaven and spreading Jesus’ love and salvation to others. It is about doing good in the world and loving all with our whole hearts, center and full of God’s amazing mercy and grace! I know that, and I want that, but (ohhh I despise that word) there is that very sore and selfish part of me that is too weak to get up and do this, that wants to wait for her Father in heaven to hopefully return the gift she thought He had given her for keeps, the only worldly thing that she had ever prayed for and desired after; a man to become a husband, Given in His time, His choosing, her only request that he love God above all else! And maybe that’s another reason why he split us up, because God wants to make sure that my only desire is in the relationship I have with Him, trusting in Him completely and doing His will. I will go on for the Lord even if I don’t get reunited with the bff, I will somehow pull myself away from the waiting and the longing, that I don’t need my bff to get on in life, although it sure would be a blessing to be with him again. I can see these goals but as I said before there are many emotions and pain clouding my head, but I hope that in time God will heal my heart. Thanks to this article I feel more encouraged to not wait but just listen and move where the Lord leads. If anyone has gone through something like this before and have advice please let me know. And any prayer would be appreciated. And thank you for sharing this thought provoking idea.

    1. Wow, I have a very similar story myself! I am now 23 years old, and I have been ‘courting’ a guy for a little over 3 years now. We have had a rather stormy relationship trying to work through our differences and of course, selfishness. But honestly, now that I look back I would not have it another way. God has shown me so much through this relationship and has taught me His faithfulness in all things…even in separation.
      During the second year of our relationship I felt that God was calling me to lay him down on the altar – just like Abraham did with Isaac. It was such a struggle and it was one of the hardest, darkest times of my life. I had such a fear of letting go, but it taught me to cling to God more tightly than ever.
      During that time, I ended up going to Bible School in a different state far from home. I poured all of my time that semester into seeking the Lord, praying, and going deep in the Word of God. After that I worked at a summer camp to raise funds because God had called me to take a trip to Japan. During the summer I cut off all contact with my boyfriend and spent all of my time focusing on God and preparing for the trip. I can’t say that I was happier during that time, but I was right where I needed to be. Anyway, after the summer was over and I was home from Japan. God changed my plans! I thought I was going to go back to the school I’d attended the previous semester and finish doing all 4 years of that University. However, things happened very differently.
      I ended up coming home broke. My financial aid fell through and the house I’d been in was about to be rented to someone else. All of the doors closed I think perhaps because of my parents and boyfriends prayers! So after seven months of being gone, I came back to my home state of Texas to live with my parents and shortly after that I felt released to once again pick up the relationship I had laid down. (He lives only about 12 minutes away from my parents house). We’ve been courting steadily since then, only now there is another bump in the road… Recently, he has felt the Lord calling him to go home to Wisconsin for a season – to work and help his family after being here doing school since he was 16. Yet this time, the parting is not so hard. Partly because I have learned to trust God more and partly because I have allowed His peace to rule in my heart. I am not afraid of the future because I don’t believe that the separation will last forever. In fact, what has encouraged me the most is the biography of ‘Jim Elliot- Missionary to Ecuador”. (I highly recommend that you read it if you get a chance.) Hearing of other people who are totally sold out for Jesus who have struggled through things like long drawn out relationships always encourages me. :D
      Although he is leaving and my heart will feel the pain of separation once again, even if we don’t ever get married… I am confident that the Lord will always do what is best for both me and him. God will never lead you astray – He always has your very best in mind. I asked God to give me a scripture for this season and this is what He gave me: Rom 11:36 “For from him and through him and to him are all things. To him be glory forever. Amen.”
      If I may, before I close, I would like to pray for you….

      Father in heaven,
      I thank you for this precious young woman whose desire is to love you above and before anything or anyone else. I thank you for the grace you’ve given her to wait thus far. Please ignite her soul with a longing for you that is greater than life itself. Let her know your love which is ‘better than wine’ which you described to us in Song of Solomon. Give her hope O God, for ‘hope deferred makes the heart sick.’ Grant her wisdom in dealing with others and help her to consider those around her as better than herself. Give her the strength to fight and the grace to challenge the Impossible. Let Your love wash over her right now that she may know the peace that surpasses all understanding. I pray that her love for You would grow deeper each day as she learns Your Word and opens herself to Your truth. Fine tune the strings of her heart so that she might feel even the smallest tug from You. Grant her mercy and rest as she looks to You. Above all else, let her One Thing, and her One dream be You. For You are the most gratifying, soul-satisfying, ravishing being in all of the Universe and we love You sooo much!!! Thank You God! I pray all these things in Your name. Amen. :D

      1. What a wonderful testimony and heartfelt prayer. I’ve recently broke up with my first boyfriend. I still love him but I feel like he doesn’t have the same values I have and though he agreed we shouldn’t kiss or anything, I feel like he doesn’t really share with this commitment. I decided to end the relationship. It hurts but I believe this is the right thing to do. I want GOD’S will more than anything. As I was reading your prayer for Hillary, I’m praying it for myself. GOD bless.

        Hugs.

    2. I went through a similar situation when I was in college. I’m not going to tell the whole story, because I could write a book ;) But what I found is that I needed to give the guy I was in love with up completely. I had to cut him off (as in no communication at all) for a while so that I could put my focus on the Lord. I couldn’t handle being best friends with him, because even though the label had changed from boy friend to friend, the emotions had not changed. Long story short, God did let us get back together! But, not before I had fully given him up – and you can’t fake it!!! I was prepared to live my life as a single woman serving the Lord. Jesus wants our hearts to be fully focused on Him. Now, 12 + years later, we are happily married with 5 children. God used that time to prepare me for things that he knew I was going to face in the future. I still have to refocus myself on the Lord. It’s so easy to put people and/or things as the focus of our worship instead of the Lord. Thank You Jesus that You don’t give up on me, but You continue to refine me and draw me closer to Your side as I surrender my heart to You!

      1. Also, I’ve known girls that went through similar situations that did not marry the guy, so this is not a magic equation. It really is about surrendering to the Lord!

  9. Oh my goodness. I was literally just telling a friend of mine at church that I am struggling with understanding God’s will for my life, specifically pertaining to a husband. I went on FB after church and someone had posted this article. It was just what I needed to hear. I think I have been on a journey for some time now coming to this realization but your words sped up the process. You clearly have a beautiful spirit and I am thankful for your writing. Thank you for your words.

  10. It’s really sad that waiting became a bargaining chip for the door prize; that we used things like purity rings to remind girls (why not boys?) to wait for the ONE God had for them, only the ONE never showed up. Why do we have to do so much damage before we get it figured out!

  11. And the poem handed to girls implies that married women are fully satisfied in Him. But we’re not perfectly satisfied in Him or necessarily more satisfied than unmarried women. Being married isn’t a prize for completing glorification — if it were, we’d all be single.

  12. Thank you very much for sharing your thoughts, i totally agree with everything you wrote, i am new-wed (6months), turning 35 in couple months, i’ve struggled a lot for 34 years about how to be satisfied with only God, it was never easy, but only when I gave up and stopped looking around and stopped expecting a mate, when i just started thinking that I might be single for the rest of my life I met who is my husband today. It doesn’t mean that God blessed me with my husband because i finally got it and decided to stop planing and expecting and asking for a husband, not at all, He wants our hearts as you said, having a husband is not a right we can demand and be fussy about, or walk away from God if we don’t get what we want, it doesn’t work like that, it is only about HIM, and having this intimate relationship with our first love Jesus :D
    Bless you for this beautiful article, I’m sure sharing it with all my single friends.

  13. Thank you so much for writing this! I was in complete disagreement at first because I didn’t really grasp your point until about midways through. However, I am in complete agreement now. While you clearly wrote this with women in mind, I think this is equally applicable to men, as well. I am a man, and I know this spoke volumes to me. There was a time in my life when I fell into depression and couldn’t sleep at night because everyone I know was either married or in the process of getting married. I wondered how long I would have to wait, and then I realized something. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that marriage is in God’s plan for everyone. In fact, Paul even suggests that it is better not to marry. if living a life of singleness will allow us to serve God better. I’ve realized that marriage is not the answer to loneliness; God is. Marriage is rather a journey of faith–two people coming together with the realization that they can serve God better together than they ever could apart. Therefore I might suggest that marriage should be a surprise, an interruption; not something we’re anxiously waiting on. Do you really think it is God’s will for us to put our lives on hold in order to wait for something that very well may not be in His plan for our lives? Surely not.

  14. What a breath of fresh air! My husband and I were both happily single (contrary to our church culture), and are both happily married (also contrary to church culture ;-)). I attended a Christian college, and remember being frustrated and angsty by the idolization of marriage and family. We forget that celibacy/singleness is a gift, however long it lasts. The Catholics have it right as they value both celibacy and marriage as sacramental, means by which we experience grace, the hand of God on our lives. May our children, young men and young women, learn the true meaning and reason for purity and falling in love with Jesus. It is not for some mystery man/woman, but for they sake of our glorious bridegroom Jesus who is coming for us on a white horse!

  15. This is absolutely beautifully said, my first thought after reading this – Wow, who is this girl? Amazing, God is so good!!!

  16. He is everything! Sometimes us girls live our lives like a damsel in distress waiting for our prince charming to come and sweep us off our feet and rescue us when Jesus is our true prince who has already done it all for us and just want to love us abundantly. Its not about waiting on a prince charming its about living life knowing that your Prince is already there at your side. :) I love this blog post! Thank you

  17. I took mine off about two years ago when my parents 37 year marriage, the one I looked up to all my life, ended in separation and then divorce. I thought, “If most marriages don’t work out today, then what’s the point of ‘waiting’?” There has to be a different kind of waiting, one that involves the same heart posture, but not the same frame of mind. You’ve given words to what I’ve wanted to say for so long. Thank you!

  18. Reblogged this on 主おほめたたえます and commented:
    I am not a woman, but I “don’t wait anymore” for the very purpose addressed by this article. It articulates the resolution that I have reached long ago but was unable to develop such a convincing assertion as stated here. It is satisfying to realize that other people share the same thought.

  19. Reblogged this on Wordart and commented:
    This is not a poem and I know Wordart is for poem but I believe a lot of my young women need to hear this and if as a youth leader I sold you God as a part of a bargain then I hope this helps to correct your views and I truly apologize. May we all fall in love with God today!

  20. This is really a great blog and I couldn’t agree more with you. A girl I was in a relationship shared this with me before we got together. After she ended it I was heart broken but it couldn’t have been a better decision because I don’t think either one of us were ready. To every single Christian man and woman out there, your marriage will be so much better, the more happy and stable both of you are before you are married. It is worth waiting a few years to make sure you are a secure person, financially, maturity level, spiritually and emotionally, than going through many more years with someone who isn’t. Marriage is beautiful, but like all good things, sin can devastate it. Immature people who aren’t ready for commitment or responsibility (both people involved) can go through a lot of heart ache, much like anything, if it isn’t properly maintained, will go downhill fast.

    To all those who say, “God put you together”. God gave you your mate and it didn’t work out. The truth is, God gave both of you that gift and what God has brought together, let no man put asunder. God ordains marriage between unbelievers and believers, one man and one woman for life. God gave us eternal life, but it doesn’t mean people will accept it or follow Him because of it. Of all the gifts God gives us, we can still mess them up big time. Marriage isn’t easy, or so I’m told, however, the mess or the struggle is all worth it, I believe.

    Here is a quote from C.S. Lewis which I think will encourage those who have had to end relationships: “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket- safe, dark, motionless, airless–it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.” ~C. S. Lewis

  21. Thank-you for this. It has been something I’ve been getting frustrated at. I’ve seen my best friends and sisters go off with their boyfriends while I stay at home, single. Then I find myself getting frustrated at God and asking myself, “Am I not good enough for anyone to notice me?”. But after some guidance, and even after reading this, God has shown me that HE is enough for me, for everything!
    I have also been frustrated with how the church plays this off too, ‘Be satisfied in God first, and then He’ll bring someone along for you.’ And this is just wrong. This idea of needing to make sure we are completely satisfied in God first has warped purity into an action based end goal. Purity is a lifestyle and not an end goal. We can’t be making our relationship with God based on how close we are to Him and based on that, when a man will come into view.
    I still have my purity ring, but my understanding of it has changed. It still means I will stay sexually pure till marriage, but it goes deeper. That God is enough for me. For everything. He is all I need.
    So thank-you for clarifying these thoughts of mine, I really appreciate it.

  22. I read this a few months ago and sought it out again today as it’s become really relevant for a good friend of mine. I can identify, as I see that SO many others can. And I just want to thank you for writing about this so eloquently and honestly while maintaining your devotion to Jesus. Thank you, sis.

  23. My wife “waited”… I didn’t. We have marital issues around that concept.

    While on one hand I see what you are saying, on the other hand, “waiting” has been given a time void connotation.

    wait: verb (used without object)1. to remain inactive or in a state of repose, as until something expected happen

    The old cliche, “the watched pot never boils,” comes to mind. The truth is the watched pot eventually boils, but to watch it is a waste of our “wait” time. We walk away from the pot to do other chores or to prep food to cook. This is the christian principle of not plain “waiting” but actively waiting. The correct terminology should be “true love awaits.” Awaits is expectation. Many stories in scripture are like that. The betrothal, a dowried and consented engagement, process involved awaiting one full year. During that year the man went to prepare a place for his bride to be. Both parties would let everyone know that they were to be wed. The bride to be would await his return by leaving the “light” on and watching for “him” over the horizon. During this time, she was actively waiting by still doing what was required of her.

    Instead of a father agreeing to a man for his daughter’s hand in marriage, the heavenly father to our understanding designs the husband for His daughter. Instead of a man paying the dowry that price was paid on the cross.

    The point of marriage is not to get out of loneliness. It is to show the world who God is in you. The parable or playwright of the wedding is the personification of the rapture, which means utter bliss. For those of us, myself included, who know God is real, but can’t see our banner, our spouse is the one who shows us who we are in God. Knowing where we are in God’s eyes is a huge blessing to making it through the day to day life and working in Ministry.

    Side note: If we live to be 100 we only get 36,525 days to live.

  24. As a single young woman, I have been working through exactly what this is articulating. If I am loving God in hopes of finding a mate and that doesn’t work out, why bother following God? My sole purpose and calling is to love the Lord with my whole heart. This was an encouragement to me!

  25. So right! I decided a few years ago that I didn’t want to live my life waiting for a husband – life is so much more than that! As I live the full life God has given me, I’ve found such freedom and joy, including freedom to do things with God that I didn’t believe I could do while single. Thank you for articulating this all so clearly.

  26. “You are complete in Christ.”
    As Dr. Richards says, this is the most unbelieved Bible verse in history.
    Doesn’t mean God’s against us wanting to get married or even seeking it. It is a good thing. It’s like having money. God’s not against us having money or possessions. He’s against money and possessions having us.

  27. Yes!!! God bless you dear sister in Christ – He is our all in all – let me tell you, even if you do have a husband, he is not the end all be all – that place forever and always belongs to our Lord and Savior Jesus.

  28. True love waits is great for teen’s. I hope those wearing the purity ring, will mature to the point there is no need for the ring.

  29. I dont know if this is what you were referring to, but….The poem “be satisfied with me” was written by blessed St. Anthony of Padua. The message also says “You will never be united with another until you are united
    With Me alone.” It doesn’t promise a husband to anyone, but it calls every human heart to the perfect love of God. It talk about “Discovering that only in Me is your satisfaction to be found.”

    And while it does talk about a human relationship that mirrors this love, many women miss the part about being completely and intensely satisfied with Him.

    I love what you wrote. Thank you so much for sharing.

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